Crystal, Brett, and Adalyn!

Day 2 blog Challenge!

2011-05-24T06:23:00.000-07:00

Look at me.. Blogging before work! Prolly means i'll be late.. as always! Ha! So today's challenge is..

Day 2: Favorite Movie

All time favorites since we know all too well i can't pick just ONE! The hangover, Wedding crashers, and Pride and prejudice(with keira knightly)! Those are my old all time faves.. Recently have found a love for How to train a dragon and Tangled though.. and Fast Five! :)

One of my fave scenes from Wedding Crashers! (One of my many faves!)

Aw, Love this movie!! Pride and Prejudice! So great!

HAHAHA!!!! Of course this is a great show!

There you have it! Woo! Day two done! :) Now i have to get ready for a long day at work.. Then probably a dr's appt with dr lish to look at why the knots in my back are so bad and won't go away! Yay!! (sarcasm) Put icy hot on them last night.. laid on a freaking heating pad forever... and laid on a little plastic nurf ball.. and it feels like i've been punched in the back every time i stretch my shoulder blades! (Cuz i've been doing a lot of that too) By the way i HATE icy hot! Awful stuff.

Big shout out to my LoViE who has been so good about rubbing my back every single night for weeks now.. He's such a trooper!! Plus he puts up with me whining about it! HAha! Gotta love him. :)

Well i think that is all for today.. Unless something amazing happens and i MUST post about it later! I have 30 minutes to get ready for work so i better get going! HAVE A WONDERFUL TUESDAY EVERYONE!! :)

Attempt at Challenge!

2011-05-23T21:26:00.000-07:00

Ok so OBVIOUSLY it took me a bit to start the 30 day blog challenge.. and i may not be great at it. I try to stay busy and not get on the computer too often but also stay WAY to busy to blog often.. Between work and kids and the LOVE of my LIFE! :) Life is great and i really want to do this blog challenge so i can stay up on this blogging thing! I'm not great at it but i want to try! Ha! I post my life on facebook most the time so i need to be better at BLOGGING my life with the kids and the love and work and what not.. and not so much on facebook! So here we go! 30 Day Challenge!

Day 1: FAVORITE SONG!

I'm a VERY musical person! Grew up in a very musical family. It is VERY hard for me to just have ONE favorite song. So i have a few i LOVE right now. I'm a HUGE Glee music fan. Right now one of my favorite songs (thanks to my friend ash!!) is "Get it right" by Glee. AMAZING! I also love "Speak Now" by Taylor Swift. I also love "Pretty/Unpretty" by Glee! And "Wish you were here" and "Push" by Avril! I've ALWAYS loved Avril. I'd have to say the "Get it right" by Rachael Berry from Glee is my FAVORITE right now. Its AMAZING! So there ya have it! :) My fave songs for right now!

Here is a link to listen to the song! :)
http://youtu.be/Rj6gfz10cS8

Life is pretty darn GREAT!! I'm so happy! I'm so glad to have finally found what they talk about when they say "finding your other half".

Cruz is my other half. He is amazing! He knows how to bring me down when i get a little to much like a GIRL and i know how to bring him up when he's acting "22" (haha! inside joke! though he is 22). I have an amazing life. Its nothing EXTREME but its great.

My kids are so great. They're amazing and well behaved and they are so beautiful and sweet and keep me on my toes! I don't know where i'd be without them. They're getting so big. I can't wait for me and cruz and our kids to do so much fun stuff this summer! :) I also have the most amazing family and friends! :) I love my life! I have the best girlfriends and great guy friends. My family is so amazing and supportive! I love them all so much! Life is good and i'm so excited for the next few months!!!! :)

Kids at willow park! They loved the birds! Adalyn kept saying "I lub da duck!"

Cruz and his daughter Hannah! We adore her. Adalyn was so concerned because Hannah was tired and she wanted to be sure she was ok! :)

LOVE MY LIFE! <3

Little update!

2011-05-11T08:26:00.000-07:00

So as usual i'm not the best blogger but here is an update!

As most of you know me and Cruz have figured things out. We took some time apart so he could figure out some very complicated stuff in his life and it turned out to be a very good week apart. Now things are wonderful just as they were before and we're planning some big stuff for the future! :) I love him so much. He's so great to me and puts up with me and he's amazing to my kids! So things are very great there!!

The kids are doing great! We're getting excited for the warmer weather so we can get out of the house!! We're excited to do some camping with cruz and hannah.. and do water days at grandma's and play at the parks and go for late walks when its cool! :) I am such a summer person and so are my kids! We can't wait!

Life is good but also a little stressful! We'll be moving soon due to the neighbor underneath us constantly harassing me about my kids actually playing in our own home! She watches our every move and whenever we come and go she looks out her window and watches to see who i'm bringing over or what we're doing! Its getting really old. I've never had a problem EVER living in apartments.. but this lady expects complete silence. Sorry move into a home in the middle of nowhere then crazy lady! You don't live in an apartment if you don't ever wanna hear people walking around or running water or whatever! So we're looking to get into moving into the new duplex's in town so that my kids can have their own little backyard and its like a home.. two car garage and the two homes are attached at the garage so we don't share walls! I can't wait! Lots going on and to come so i'll try to keep everyone updated!! :)

So i've decided that i want to try this so that it gives me more to blog about! I mean there is usually just the usual going on so i just wanted to try this and give me something to keep me updating more and its something that i think looks like a lot of fun! :)

30 Day Blog Challenge
day one: my favorite song
day two: my favorite movie
day three: my idea of the perfect first date
day four: my favorite photograph of my best friend
day five: how important do i think education is?
day six: a photo of an animal I'd love to keep as a pet
day seven: my dream wedding
day eight: a song to match my mood
day nine: a photo of the item i last purchased
day ten: a photo of my favorite place to eat
day eleven: what is in my makeup bag?
day twelve: my current relationship, and if single discuss how my single life is
day thirteen: my views on drugs and alcohol
day fourteen: a TV show i am currently addicted to
day fifteen: something i don't leave the house without
day sixteen: my view on homosexuality
day seventeen: how i hope my future will be like
day eighteen: five things that irritate me about the opposite/same sex
day nineteen: my reflection in the mirror
day twenty: the meaning behind my blog name
day twenty one: a photo of something that makes me happy
day twenty two: a letter to someone who has hurt me recently
day twenty three: fifteen facts about me
day twenty four: a photo of something that means a lot to me
day twenty five: who am i?
day twenty six: a photo of somewhere i want to go
day twenty seven: what kind of person attracts me?
day twenty eight: in this past month, what have i learned?
day twenty nine: something i could never get tired of doing
day thirty: a photograph of myself today and three good things that have happened in the past thirty days

I will start the Challenge tonight! :) Since i've already posted just now!

Happily ever after.. What a load!

2011-04-13T07:56:00.000-07:00

Life doesn't always make sense.. Sometimes i wonder what the meaning is to EVERYTHING in life.. and this of course is just frustrating and then i have to remind myself that its not in my hands and eventually it'll all make sense. If not i can always have a good long talk with God after this life and ask him all my questions! ;)

I have discovered recently.. thanks to a VERY wonderful friends.. That i am afraid to be happy. This is so true that i didn't even realize it till she practically spelled it out for me. I am TERRIFIED to be happy. So i've decided to spill it all out and tell you all why! (You may not be asking but meh it makes me feel better to write down my frustration and concerns)

Since my divorce i have been CRUSHED. I actually remember many times where i thought to myself "Wow, i miss my marriage. It was so much easier than this!" Now my marriage was no walk in the park. It had big problems which is why it ended but at some points my life really did get so much harder than i ever expected it to after divorce. I thought oh its going to get so much better from here. I was so unhappy i can only go up from here.. BLAH BLAH BLAH! Life is all about learning. Unfortunately i didn't realize how much i still needed to learn.

My first relationship after my marriage was my longest since my divorce and also the worst time in my life. SERIOUSLY the worst experience of my life. Yes i learned a lot about myself and i believe that is the point to hardships in life.. Learning. After being cheated on, letting his parents be awful to me.. and worse him allowing it, and being dropped off in ogden and watching him drive away with me having no one there to take me home.. I hit rock bottom and started climbing back up. I realized that i had put myself through FAR to much and it was time to grow up. Hitting rock bottom made me realize my life was far to complicated for many reasons.. the biggest being my absense from the church. For that i'll always be grateful for hitting rock bottom.

It took me a long time to decide to DATE again. I honestly didn't want to. I kept myself busy with Kids, Work, and friends. When i finally did find someone i was interested in i fell quickly and let myself just enjoy it. It was open, comfortable and fun. However in the midst of my happiness.. a text message break up caused me to fall hard and fall with no answers why, no face to face conversation, and feeling completely blind sided. I now know the reasons why this happened but it was a long miserable holiday season. I must say i have the WORST luck with Ex Wives! Ha! Its something i now look at as entertaining..

That relationship was the biggest blow. I have had a ridiculously hard time recovering with no answers. I'm just that kind of girl. I like to talk it out. I like to be honest. I remember actually saying i'm a big girl i can handle the truth.. but i guess some people don't like facing it themselves. Its true. Sometimes we don't like admitting the truth to ourselves. Maybe because we feel ashamed.. or know we're making a mistake.. or just because it makes us buck up and grow up. I've had to be honest with myself many times. I let myself fall to easily. I tend to fall for the wrong man. Whether this be because of circumstances, he's a douche, or timing.. If its wrong i'll fall. I've fallen for the abusive guy, the neglectful guy, the cheating/parents money over all guy, the immature guy, and the awful timing guy. I'm working on finding the RIGHT guy! Ha and please spare all the "He's out there you'll find him" BS! I've heard it all and honestly its a LOAD!

My most recent heartache shook me good.. but i'm doing well. Falling for the best friend was something i thought sounded AMAZING. I mean come on.. Falling for the one person you can already be yourself with, and completely honest with.. Its a GREAT story. However, timing was in this case EVERYTHING. When things happen in their life that so profoundly can affect your life and the life of your children.. You are forced to stop and think. Yes these things didn't happen TO YOU but they're not INVOLVING YOU and it was something i had to make a decision on. My kids are my life. I want nothing more than to give them a WONDERFUL life. In this case there was too much there that could bring such negativity and would be so hard to deal with that it was something i knew had to be called off. It was not an easy decision. I went through the five stages of grief and after all that i realized i had to be a mother first and a girlfriend later. Sometimes people have to deal with their OWN problems/issues.. and its ok to let them. Its not easy to let go.. And now i've not only lost my boyfriend but i lost my best friend. We're working on it but it is not the same. It breaks my heart because i said above everything i would save the friendship.. and i'm working very hard to get it back.

So there you have it.. This is why i'm afraid to be happy! The minute i become TOO happy it all falls apart. I am so guarded now i wonder if i'll ever let myself just be with someone and accept feeling happy and not being afraid. It doesn't look like i will but i'm honestly ok with just being a mom, and surround myself with friends and family! I can handle loneliness a lot better than i can handle hurt anymore. I've become to realize that i'm good at relying on myself. I know its not always easy but i wont' hurt myself.. and i very rarely let myself down. I may be that mom that just never gets married again.. or never really dates.. and i'm ok with that. I have realized i don't NEED someone. That was the hard thing to learn in all this. I do not need to be with someone to feel complete or happy. I have a lot in life to be grateful for and yes there are times i see a happy couple and think to myself.. Why is it so easy for everyone else to find someone for them? Why isn't that me? Then i remind myself that i'm ok! My life isn't perfect but i have the most amazing children in the world and they get me through everything!! I love them so much.

I'm not much of a blogger but once in a while i decide that maybe if i blog my feelings then i'll feel better. Not that many read them anyways.. but it makes me feel better to let it out. So there ya have it.. My happily ever after doesn't involve prince charming so far.. plus who needs a prince.. I have two gorgeous kids, the best friends in the world, and an amazingly supportive family! I don't need anything else!

Time Flies!

2011-03-02T19:25:00.000-08:00

So Apparently i only update my blog every couple months! Last time i did was Christmas time.. WOW! I'm a horrible blogger. Ha! Maybe its our same ol everyday life that makes me that way. I do like to keep it some what updated for those who like to check it more than facebook. So Lets catch up on what the NEW YEAR has brought to my amazing lil family! :) Here are a few recap pictures of last year! :) To catch us up on what we were up to in 2010. (I have decided 2010 was a pretty much not so great year!)

We started 2010 in our apartment in brigham! :)

This is one of my favorite pictures!

When spring finally rolled around we couldn't wait to get outside to play!

We went to the park all the time in layton and the kids loved it!

Lots of fun days babysitting and playing at my parents house!

I got them all dressed up and we put together a "Music Video"! So awesome!

The kids LOVED playing in the sandbox all summer!!

Made for VERY dirty kids by the end of the day!

Adalyn being her usual goofy self! :)

They loved the swing set!

Every nice day brought us outside.. Most days we had lunch

on our back patio right here!

In the summer the kids were in their swimming suits

almost 99% of the day! :) Ha! They loved the water and sunshine!

More fun at the park that is down the street from my parents!

We LOVE summer!

We set the tent up in the backyard around the 4th of july!

Brett helped me set it up. They loved sleeping outside!!

We did lots of our own fireworks for the 4th!

Brett LOVED the sparklers. Adalyn wouldn't get near them!

Lots of fun family events in the summer!!

This is me and my WONDERFUL mom at Chelsea's Baby Shower for Owen!

First time dressing up for Halloween in FOREVER!

It was so fun. I can't seem to find the pics of the kids costumes! :(

Me and My Best Friend Cruz went on our own little

Ghost Hunting Adventure! It was seriously so much fun!

My babies are growing so fast! This year Brett turned 4

and Adalyn turned 2! I love this picture of her! She was

So giggly when everyone was singing to her! :)

I just posted lost of christmas pictures so i won't post anymore! It was a year that was full of ups and downs and i'm glad to see it go. 2011 has been something i've looked forward to for sure!

I would like to say that 2011 has been SO MUCH BETTER than 2010 was.. BY FAR! We moved into our own place the middle of December and its been WONDERFUL having a place to call our own. We've got plenty of space and the kids love it. We're so excited for it to warm up so that we can go play in the pool and on the playground here. The kids are growing fast. They're getting so smart i love it. Brett is getting more into playing games. He's getting smart at that stuff.. He has a laptop that is lightning Mcqueen and it is teaching him so much about lettings and spelling and numbers. Its been really good for him. Adalyn talks NON STOP! The things that girl says sometimes cracks me right up. She is also ALL girl. We've recently learned she is ALL ABOUT SHOPPING!! She also loves chapstick (she calls it lips) and to smell pretty (my perfume). Its so cute. I love it. I had surgery the beginning of february and it went good but didn't fix a lot of the problems i had in there.. so that was a little disappointing. Recovery went well though as far as the surgery part went and its just something i'm going to deal with and keep moving forward.

Working at the hospital is wonderful. I seriously love my job so much. I love the people i work with and i'm in a new area of the hospital now and its been so great so far. I'm back in the labor and delivery area and its amazing to get to see all the little babies and hear the fetal monitors while you're back there. I <3>

Well there ya have it. Hope you liked the flash back! I will probably post in a while when there is an update on something new or something i wanna talk about! Haha!

"Sleeping under the Tree" Family Christmas Party!

2010-12-06T07:36:00.000-08:00

Since i was little every year for Christmas we have our own little family Christmas party. We call this our "Sleeping under the Christmas tree" Party. At this party we play games, go see lights, watch christmas movies, sing christmas songs, build gingerbread houses.. and LAUGH and TALK a lot. Then at the end of the night we sleep around the christmas tree. All in the same room. :) Its so much fun. We've done this for YEARS. Since i was young. This year is the first year we've done in since we all started having kids though. It was SO much fun. It is so great and amazing to me when i get to share my childhood traditions with my own children. It makes me so happy. I've always done the christmas eve tradition we do. We open one gift on christmas eve before bed.. Growing up it was ALWAYS pajamas to wear to bed for christmas. :) We always knew what it was gonna be but we loved it. I've carried this on and do it with my kids.

This year we were ALL there for the family party. It is a rare that we ALL get to get together. My parents and the three little boys, Me and my two kids, Chelsea nick and their boys, Chris was even there.. and Andrew (the new addition to the family!). It was seriously such a fun night. Ate yummy food.. spend some good quality time together.. Made gingerbread houses for the kids.. My dad read everyone a christmas book.. and then we sang christmas songs. :) My kids had a blast and it makes me so thankful for such a wonderful fun family to share such great experiences with. We're a close family and i'm so thankful for it.

I love this time of year and all the wonderful feelings of gratitude and thankfulness it brings. I love the feeling in the air. Everyone is a little more cheery and most of us remember that its about giving and being with the ones we love. I'm so grateful for such an amazing family and for the opportunity to share my childhood traditions with my own children. They're the best things in my life and i love doing things with them that i hope are making positive long lasting memories. I am looking forward to more fun. :)

Enjoy the pictures!! There will be so many more to come of all the fun this year! :)

The gingerbread house i helped adalyn make! :)

Brett and his gingerbread house he made! :)

Adalyn in her SNOW attire.. from behind.. She looks so cute.

My little Snow Bunny! <3>

Brett in his snow gear!! :) He loves his spiderman hat!

I love them.. And i love this time of year! :) I'm so blessed.

Crystal, Brett, and Adalyn!! :)

..:. bLeSsEd .:..

2010-12-05T21:09:00.001-08:00

I had to take a moment and express how thankful i am to be so BLESSED! I am so blessed to have such amazing kids. I do not know where i'd be without them. They're my foundation of who i am. They keep me solid when my world is not. I cannot imagine my life without them. I am also so thankful for an amazing family.. Parents who love me no matter what, a sister i look up to so much, a brother who ALWAYS has my back, younger lil brothers that are so much fun and such great playmates for my kids. I have the best most amazing TRUE friends. The kind that through thick and thin are always there for me.. Especially Jenalee and Carson.. They've seen me through EVERYTHING. No matter how many stupid mistakes i've made they've always been the best friends ever. They are always willing to give advice and help in any way. I look up to them so much. I have so many things to be thankful for.. A job and wonderful people in my life.

I have to express now how very extremely and endlessly thankful i am for my Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ and the Gospel. I do not know where i would be or how i would have made it through the last few months without any of them. I have relied on the Scriptures and Prayer so much. I have never been so close to my heavenly father than i am now. Its amazing how when you start to rely on the gospel not out of being forced by your parents but because you want it in your life... how much more you appreciate it! I have not been "Perfect" by any means what so ever. I have a lot of bumps in the road and have strayed from the gospel. Its amazing how finding your way back and paying attention to your blessings can open your eyes to its beauty. I feel like i do not have enough words to express my gratitude and i'm truly humbled by the power of the gospel. I am so thankful for it in my life. I am thankful to have it and to be able to start going to my own ward soon and take the kids. I am thankful

to be able to teach them the same amazing values and ways of the church that i was taught as a child. There are so many amazing things that have happened to me in the last few months since finding myself back in the right place and i am so thankful for every single one of them. I have been so blessed. Life has not always been easy or made sense but through prayer, scripture study and faith i have found myself and found the amazing power of the gospel. I will forever be in debt to my Savior and the amazing sacrifice he made so that even after all my stupid mistakes i can repent and find my way back to them in the end. I'm looking forward to so many things the gospel has to offer.. Things like patriarchal blessing.. and temple marriage.. and callings.. and so much more!!

Thanks to everyone again for being so supportive over the last few months!! You have no idea how much you've touched my life and i will be forever grateful!! :)

Crystal, Brett, and Adalyn! <3

..Uplifted..

2010-11-29T10:45:00.000-08:00

I am now crying because i so needed to read this poem! I am so grateful for moments like this when i know that no matter how hard my life is i'm never alone and not only do i have my loving family and amazing friends who are there for me and the best two kids that keep me so strong but i have the Lord to help pick me up when i'm feeling at my worst and the most heart broken. I am struggling with understanding life but i have never been so grateful for the gospel and the amazing examples in my life. There is a reason for everything and i know in time i will understand the reason for this. Thank you to everyone for all your support, kind words and concern. I have the most amazing support group in the entire world and i honestly don't know where i'd be without you. (you know who you are!) In lifes hardest moments you find out who is really there for you and i'm so grateful for that. I'm so grateful for the gospel and the strength its been the last few days. I have never been so reliant on it and its power. The lord has been the one i have cried to more than anyone and i am so very grateful to him and the savior for the blessings and strength they've given me to keep my head up and go on with the day. It has not been easy but they've blessed me with the best most supportive family in the world. Life is a miserable thing sometimes but it is the beauty of it all. If we didn't struggle we wouldn't appreciate true happiness when it comes around. Even if it is only for a very brief moment that you feel such happiness. I am very lucky to have had such a few wonderful months and believe that there is someone out there that i will share happiness with for all time and eternity! :) Sorry i got all mooshy there everyone but i had such a huge feeling of gratitude to My heavenly father, My brother Jesus Christ, My most loving and amazing family, My true and faithful friends, and the best most amazing kids a mother could ever be blessed with. I have been so down lately that it has taken a step back and a quick read of a poem to make me realize i'm not alone. This pain is temporary and i will find my happy ending. No one should dictate my happiness except myself! Thanks again everyone. I want to share this poem with you because it absolutely lifted my spirits!

Footprints in the Sand - Poem

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticedthat during the low periods of my life,when I was suffering fromanguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,“You promised me Lord,that if I followed you,you would walk with me always.

But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my lifethere have only been one set of footprints in the sand.

Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?”

The Lord replied,“The times when you have seen only one set of footprints in the sand,is when I carried you.”

(Sorry if this got a little "churchy" for some!! I just am so very grateful for the gospel in my life! I do not want to offend anyone. Just had to share how grateful i was for what i've been blessed with! (: Thanks!)

My favorite time of year! :)

2010-10-17T20:20:00.000-07:00

Fall is seriously my favorite time of year!!! Christmas may be my favorite holiday but fall is my fave season!! :) I've had such a blast already!! Me and the kids painted pumpkins and oh my goodness let me just tell you how fun that was! :) I loved it and so did they. I honestly LOVE painting pumpkins!!! I could do millions and not get sick of it! Its so fun to me!! I let the kids paint one side of theirs and then i did the other side! It was a blast. I also did one for me and my brother chris and his friend andrew that lives with us! SOO fun!! Here is how they turned out!

The kids pumpkins!! :) Bretts on the left and Adalyns on the right!

Mine and Chris's Pumpkins!!

Up Close of Chris's pumpkin!! :) It was so fun!

Andrews Pumpkin! :) (He loves DC shoes so i put the symbol on there)

Also this fall i've found a love for RUNNING!! I am not usually a runner but i love being outside in the fall.. The air is so crisp and cool and its my favorite. So i've started running and i love it. Put my ipod in my ears and just forget about everything for a while Its been great for toning up and feeling healthier. I have had to take a short break from it and i'm going nuts. I'll probably be having surgery in the next little while (same surgery i've had 3 times before). Any physical activity right now really hurts so i've had to take a break from running and i'm hating it. Can't wait to get back into it.

Also have been to the haunted hallow in Logan! I went with a group of friends and it was a blast! :) I LOVE haunted houses and stuff like that!! SO MUCH FUN!! :) So far fall has been great. I'm loving it. Next big thing is just to get through the surgery part of life and recover and get back in the game. Hoping it'll fix a lot of problems and i'll be feeling normal again!! :)

Fall is here!

2010-09-21T21:11:00.000-07:00

I'm going to try and get better at blogging!! Here is an update!

The Kids:

Brett is getting so tall. He's gonna be tall and skinny like his dad. He LOVES playing with the boys and is so protective of me and his sister! I love it. He always brings me flowers from outside. I'm raising such a gentleman!! He is turning 4 on the 25th this month! I can't believe it. Its nuts!! He's obsessed with iron man.. So we're having an iron man themed bday party for him!!

Adalyn is getting so damn much personality! She's so bubbly and fun! The girl would rather you put music on and let her dance than a movie on for her to watch! She's so much fun. She's got enough hair now for pigtails and ponytails. I love it. I've made her new bows i love em! She pulls em out but i'm teaching her not too. ha!

They both are loving the summer (as am i). We've spent so much time outside. In the backyard playing in the sandbox.. the swing set.. the playhouse.. playing games.. going to the park and for walks. Going to the zoo was super fun! the kids loved it!!

We're about to get into our own place in October and we're SO excited. Its where we lived last summer. Every time we pass it still to this day brett asks "we going to mom's house?" So i think they're excited. I'm so excited for us to have a place to call our own! :) It'll be good for us. I think they deserve a place to call home and not call grandma's and grandpa's! Hopefully we'll be in by halloween!! Then i can decorate for our first holiday in OUR home!! :)

Me:

Well as most of you know.. Back in February i moved in with my (at the time) boyfriend Tom. We'd dated for almost a year and had decided to live together. He thought it'd be helpful so i wouldn't have to work while going to school which at the time i thought was a great idea. It didn't end well. Buying a home in the area he wanted to buy in ended up becoming more of a priority to him and his parents than i was. It was a very sad hurtful and frustrating situation. We've been back at my parents house since end of june and its been great to be around people who love us. I went through a VERY hard time but got back up on my feet fast and got a job and was enjoying dating.. Until i got a SMACK IN THE FACE reminder of how hard and tedious it is! ha! Its amazing to me what an inconvenience it is to others that i'm so busy! haha! Apparently working full time, going to school full time and being as good a mother as i can be to my two kids makes me not so much fun for most people i used to call friends. And having standards and expectations when it comes to dating/potential relationships is also something that makes you undatable.. ha! Thank goodness. Haha! I honestly have no desire to date much at all. I've found out who my true friends are along the way as well. Turns out most the people i would call FRIENDS when i went through one of the hardest things i've ever been through were the first ones to go running in the other direction and i'm so thankful to know who has my back through thick and thin! :) They are amazing people i'll always be grateful too.

So i've learned a lot. I've learned that until i'm getting married i will never trust anyone enough to live with them. I will never be without a job ever again. It makes me to vulnerable to not take care of myself and my babies. I am done putting them through hell when i make bad decisions. I've got a very thick very tall very DURABLE guard up now.. and its going to take a lot to break it down or even get my attention through it. My kids are my priority. Its amazing how lost in a situation you can get. How you can think you're doing something good for them when really you'd of been better off doing the opposite. I'm learning. I'm not perfect but i'm trying for them. I live with guilt everyday for making life harder on them than i feel is needed. I hate that they do not have their dad around all the time and that we don't have our own place to call home. I'm glad and grateful to have such a wonderful father for them and to also be heading in the right direction. I'm getting back on track and it feels great! I feel healthier. Emotionally, mentally, and physically! :) I was not in a good place for a while and coming out of that never felt better.

Ok!!! Out of the gloom and onto the beautiful!! We recently got our family pics done!!! And i could not be more happy about them! They turned out great. My friend Danielle did them. Her business is Capture me photography! If you have facebook.. look it up and become a fan. She's doing an amazing fundraiser right now for each fb fan! :) She does amazing work. Check her out!! Here are some of the AMAZING pictures she did!! (she also did the on that is our blog picture!) Enjoy!!

My little family! :)

He's the most handsome boy in the world!!

Haha I love the hand on his hip! And adalyn doin her own thing!

Peekin through the fence at a puppy!

They suddenly both just squeezed me! I love this one. Shows how much we love each other!

Its been a very fun and busy summer for us!! :) Stay tuned for more. I'm going to try and keep this thing updated as often as possible!!

Crystal, Brett and Adalyn! :)

Escape!

2010-02-25T20:55:00.000-08:00

I am horrible at this bloggin' stuff! So here is a quick update of us!

We've moved down to layton and are trying to get settled. I'm not a "city" Girl.. and Layton is the city to me so its definitely an adjustment but it'll all work out. Brett and adalyn are growin so fast! Brett now sings the ABC's ALL the time! Its so cute.. Adalyn is constantly asking "was dat?" I love it!! They're so much fun and i adore them. :) They make my life what it is!! :)

Life can be complicated and trying to figure out where its going sometimes really sucks! I'm still in school and doing REALLY good. I'm liking it.. well i like my med classes.. hate my generals. I'm doing good though. Life has been a little stressful and i'm ready for a break.. Enter ST. GEORGE TRIP!! :) Jenalee and Carson two of my favorite people ever invited me to go to St. George with them since i don't have my kids this weekend and i can't wait!! I need some sun and change of scenery! :) So badly!! Also, i'm enjoying the NEW additions. They're great and definitely have helped the self esteem. So here are some recent pics of me and my kiddies! Sure there will be more to come of the st. george trip!! :)

My lil princess, fresh outta the tubby.. wrapped in her towel! :)

Ha! This isn't as naughty as it looks. Brett tries to count with his fingers now but can't do three.. so when he tries to do three this is how it happens.. I thought it was hilarious!

My beautiful miss piggy!! I love her hair in pig tails! :)

Brett wanted me to make a playdough "mommy" then a "baby" then a "brett brett" and then a "daddy"! Oh this kid melts my little heart! :)

Hair getting so long... Almost where i want it.. and soon hopefully it'll be blonde!!

Just got out of surgery (breast aug.) and i guess i thought it'd be funny to take this picture! I don't remember this but Tom says i was pretty hilarious!

New Ladies! :) LOVE EM!

He loves me!! :) Almost as much as i love him!

Listening to mommy's ipod! :) He's so handsome!

Listening to mommy's ipod!! She's so silly!

Crystal, Brett and Adalyn!

Aw! Ladies get an update!

2010-01-11T21:39:00.000-08:00

So yes its official!! I'm getting the ladies done and i am so excited i had to share the AMAZING news!! Its definitely needed.. after nursing two babies! :) It'll be a great confidence booster after feeling like crap about myself in that department!! :) Yay!! Thursday Morning i'll be a new woman. I'll update everyone on how the procedure goes. Anyways, Here are some fun new pics!

Aw! I love these too! Watching polar express after breakfast!

Adalyn taking a picture of herself with my phone!

Taking a pic of the three of us!

Our Tree!!

Adalyn fell asleep before we finished grocery shopping! HA!

This picture is my fave! :) They melt my heart!

She is so stinking cute! She loves bretts dump truck!

The rag after brett crack his head open! Blood was EVERYWHERE!

My poor lil man's head!

The new hair! Blonde highlights, and some red brown in with my dark!

I LoVe NYC! :)

2009-12-30T13:41:00.000-08:00

Yep here they are! Some fun pics from my amazing Thanksgiving in NYC! I'm very much a country girl.. but New York has made me very much a city lover! :) To give ya a run down.. Tom grew up in South Salem in Ny. Gorgeous area.. Beautiful huge colonial homes lots of trees.. just amazing! We spent a few days with his parents.. then on BLACK FRIDAY we went down to downtown Manhattan to see the sights! Tom was such a GREAT tour guide. Growing up in New York the city is no big thing for him but he was so great about showing me EVERYTHING! We started off taking a train to the city from white plains.. We got off at Grand Central! It is beautiful and very busy. We walked up fifth avenue and i was in HEAVEN! Gucci, Armani, Louis, Juicy, Prada, and the list goes on! I seriously couldn't help but go in and just wish i had the money to spend. I'm sure i couldn't even afford to use their bathroom! ha! Then we made our way up to Central park. Its beautiful. I loved it. We walked down and around to time square! I mean you imagine how bright and big and tall and amazing it all is but ITS SO MUCH BETTER! I saw the MTV building, Kodak, and Toys R us. Toys R us was amazing! I want to take my kids there! They had this HUGE ferris wheel inside.. it was amazing. They had a new moon set up in there and you bet your butt that i got pictures! They had the actual motorcyles and volturi thrones in there and i got pics with em! We saw Broadway! It was amazing to see the signs for the shows and how bright and active it was. I didn't get to see a show due to time but i've put it on the wish list for next time. We then went to Tom's friend Megan's house and got ready for his 10 year high school reunion. We went and ate some yummy mexican (which cost us over 120 dollars!!) and then went to Johnny Utah's a fun bar with a mechanical bull for the reunion. (Ha yeah we got lots of jokes that we were from utah at johnny utahs!) Then the next day we went to The Museum of Natural History! W O W ! ! ! It was amazing. I loved it. Then we spent some more time with his friends and family before we headed back to Utah. The feel over there is COMPLETELY different than it is over here. I loved getting a taste of it. Its beautiful over there and i loved everyone i met. I can't wait to go back. So here ya go.. Here are the pictures you were waiting for! :) Enjoy!! I sure did. (these pictures didn't end up on here in order.. so yeah thats why i stepped ya through what we did!)

A cool Exhibit from The Museum of Natural History!

Its side ways but this is the big dino when you first walk in the museum!

The men and me at Johnny Utahs! Mmm.. Malibu Bay Breeze!

The Empire State building at night! Amazing! The colors mean something but i'm not sure what.. You can google it!

Walking to Johnny Utahs in Downtown Manhattan, With the Empire State Building behind us!

Eating at the Mexican restaurant with all Toms friends! Me, Tom, Ryan, Melissa, Jessica, Chris, Dave, and Megan! :) Such a fun group!

Ground Zero! They're building a memorial for the World Trade Centers!

Me and Tom! Riding the Subway to Ground Zero! :) I Lub him!

Toys R Us! This is the Ferris Wheel! :) So cool.

Yes thats right.. The motorcyles from new moon!

Time Square Baby!

Me at Carnegie Hall!

The gorgeous Central Park!

This guy was hilarious! Dressed up as the statue of liberty and letting ya take pictures!

Gucci!! Yes i of course went inside!! I'm a Gucci Girl for sure!

Armani! I loved this billboard!

Me and Leno at the NBC Studios! :)

Rockefeller Center Ice Skating!

Me and the Amazing tree at Rockefeller Center!

I had such an amazing time! I can't wait to go back.. Maybe during the summer!! :) Thanks so much babe for taking me along and showing me a great time! I love you! :) He's so great to me! The kids got to spend time with daddy and their grandparents while i was gone! Big thanks to Clint and Bill and Judy for taking the kids! They had a blast i'm sure. :)

Crystal, Brett, and Adalyn! :)

I'm horrible!

2009-12-05T21:52:00.000-08:00

Oh my goodness i'm horrible at this! I never update this dumb thing! haha! So here we go..

So recently i started school.. Well like 2 months ago. LOVE IT! I'm getting my assosicates degree in medical specialties. It has a range of different certifications and i'm loving it. Me and Tom are still dating! :) I love him so much. He's amazing to me! Its nice to finally have a guy who is so good to me!! He knows how to be in a relationship and no one is perfect but he's as close as it gets! :) I'm still living in brigham with the kiddies! They're getting so big! Brett turned 3 in September, and adalyn just turned 1 the end of november! I can't belive it!! Where does the time go! I decided i wanted to have some fun with some pictures so here are a bunch to go through time with my kids and me and some other fun stuff! :)

My baby girl the day she was born!! Beautiful from day one! :) Miss this..

My princess on her 1st birthday! :) Gorgeous baby girl! I love her!

My baby boy the day after he was born! The very first real true love of my life! :)

Ha him now! :) He's such a crack up! No bottoms and mommy's boots!

My cute lil munchkins watching a sing-along together! <3>

Now for some random...

One of my favorite things about christmas! :)

I want to go here!!
AUSTRALIA!

My NEWEST favorite show!

Mostly its my fave show because of him...

Paul Wesley!

Fave movie this year..

A drink i always keep in the house..

Its been a great year so far! There has definetely been some ups and downs.. what with the divorce and what not but overall this year has been great! The divorce was a good thing, Moving into our own place has been great, Tom is amazing and i don't know where he's been my whole life.., and so much more! Tom took me to Tahoe and New York.. I've started school.. My kids are healthy and beautiful and i couldn't be more thankful for all the amazing people in my life! :)

Crystal and Kids! :)

Wow.. in need of an update!

2009-08-09T09:45:00.000-07:00

WOW!!! Its been so long since i've updated this thing.. we've been so crazy busy that i just forget to sit down and tell ya'll whats going on with us! So here we go..

We've moved into our new apartment!! WE LOVE IT!! Its been a lot of fun so far.. the kids love the pool!! :) We moved in the weekend after the 4th and have been slowly getting everything organized and put away. Moving is no fun, but its nice to have it all done and taken care of. Brett will be three next month.. i can't believe it. He's getting so big so fast. He's learning so many words and phrases and i love it. He keeps me so entertained. The kid comes up with the funniest stuff. He has found a new love for Dora the Explorer.. which isn't my favorite cartoon in the world but teaches him a lot of new words and has him even saying colors now! Little adalyn will be 9 months at the end of this month and i don't know where the time has gone with her either. She's crawling EVERYWHERE and pulling herself up on everything and standing and is so close to walking already!! I can't believe it. We just switched her to formula.. which was NO fun for me.. but she's adjusted to it so well. She loves it.. but has issues with juice. She just doesn't like it. Ha! Go figure. I just adore my kids! They're seriously so much fun.. I mean yes there are days i want to rip my hair out strand by strand but i seriously don't know what i'd do without them!!

Hmm.. Other than all that I've been trying to get into school to do Medical Assisting. Getting grants and loans so i can get it done so that i'll have a reliable good job.. After getting my medical assisting i am wanting to be trained to be a Surgical Technician!! :) Hopefully it all works out! I've started seeing a GREAT guy! My aunt and uncle set me up with him back in march/april.. and we went out and talked for a while.. then i went back to tremonton and after i moved to brigham we went out and started hanging out again! He's so freaking nice and so fun! Its going great and i'm having a good time! Life honestly is so great right now.. its amazing how miserable you can get without realizing it.. and when life starts to turn around you realize how much you were missing out on. Life throws some serious curve balls our way sometimes and we make some decisions that make it more complicated but i'm so glad i'm finally on a path that is making me very happy! It was worth the wait. My kids are most of that.. i don't know what i'd do without them. They make life worth going on when it gets really rough. I've been called some pretty fun names.. had people question choices and blame me for things not working out.. but thats ok! I've got an amazing support system (that i've seen in action when i've gotten attacked! Ha!) and i couldn't ask for more than that. So yeah life is pretty much sunshine and rainbows right now! haha!! I am LOVING it.

My lil Miss Adalyn pulling herself up on everything now!

Ha! I found brett asleep in his room like this.. Like his daddy much? I think so!

Me and Optimus Prime!! This is so mine when the verizon store is done with it.. i'm so excited!

Mmm.. Nummy box! Ha she's so cute! :)

Yes, that'd be me feeling up the mannequins at JcPenny! :) Fun times!

Summer is the BeSt!

2009-06-01T21:27:00.000-07:00

Summer is seriously a blast!! There is so much to do with the kiddies! I love being able to get out of the house and go for walks, go to the park, and playin in water!! :) Getting a tan (or a burn) and eating popsicles! I love summer! Its so fun. Brett is such an outsider! He loves being outside doing ANYTHING! He can just walk around and help clint with yard work or LOVES to play in the pool! So we went to my moms house the other day to let all the boys play in the pool and sit outside and just have a good time. It was so fun!! We had Me and my kiddies, My mom and dad and the lil boys, and Chels came with jace! It was a blast! The boys had such a fun time playing in the pool. Me and Kaleb even had a water fight! Haha! He kicked my butt!! :) I got FRIED but it was so worth it! Even miss adalyn had a great time.. she played in the playpen and played with grandma, grandpa, and aunt chels! It was a blast! Here are some fun pics!! :)

Haha! I wanted to take a random crazy picture... and this is what ya get! haha!

PaPa and Adalyn!! Love this picture! :)

Kody Downin a Pepsi!! Kid has taste! :)

Kody and Kory playing in the pool.. and bretts head!

Chels filling up water balloons.. and brett and jace trying to help!

Bretts swimming suit is a little big.. or his bum is too small!

Beautiful Adalyn enjoying the day outside in the playpen!!

All the lil guys playin in the pool!!

Brett, Kody, Kory, Kaleb, and Jace!

Jace and Kody!! I love jace's face!

BIG CHEESER!! Ha! I love her guts!

Kaleb, Kory, and Kody! Cutest lil brothers ever!

Had so much fun!! Can't wait for the next play day in the sun!! :) Hope everyone is enjoying their summer so far!! :) Can't believe june is already here!! Adalyn will be 7 months at the end of this month!! CRAZY!! She's growing so fast.. its so fun and sad at the same time. Its been an amazing 7 months with her! She's such a sweet baby girl and i love her!! I also can't believe my lil man will be 3 in only 3 short months! I can't believe it. He's such a sweet lil man.. he's rowdy and some days i wonder how i'll survive the toddler stage but he's such a smart and fun lil guy! He keeps me going and keeps me and clint smiling.. and his sister too! Our kids are amazing! I'm so lucky!! As a mom i can't imagine two better kids in the whole world! Love them so much! :)

<3>

Love <3

2009-05-28T20:11:00.001-07:00

I love the way that my two lil ones love each other! They're so cute sometimes. Adalyn is just so fasinated with her brother. She always laughs at him and its so cute. When he's running around and jumping around like a mad man she just giggles so hard! Its so cute. Brett loves her just as much. He constantly is giving her loves and kisses. He comes running anytime he hears her cry! Its so cute! I love them!! Here are some cute pictures of some of the fun that they have together!

Brett and Adalyn playing in bretts room and watching mulan 2.

(Brett is so excited!)

Giving his sissy loves!! So precious!

Silly little adalyn! Sitting up like a big girl in her boppy!

Brett jumping on his bed like a true monkey!

Brett wanted to sit in the boppy.. Adalyn rolled over to watch him!! I love them!

My kids are so fun!! They can be such handfuls! Mostly the toddler.. but they're so worth it. So much fun. We've been enjoying fun days outside in the sun playing in water.. and brett loves it!! :) We're loving the warm weather!! We need a vacation! A fun camping trip with the kids! Anyways, i hope everyone is having a great beginning of the summer!! :) We sure are!

Playin Catch up...

2009-05-02T20:26:00.000-07:00

So i haven't posted for a while so its time to play catch up!!

First off... EASTER! My lil ones got lots of fun stuff for easter!! Brett got LOTS of candy, A cute easter outfit.. a stuffed bunny and some toys! Adalyn got an easter dress of course! She also got some candy.. cuz i had too! haha! Also she got a summer outfit with shoes to match her dress and a hat to go with her outfit! She also got a stuffed easter duck! Brett loved easter! He woke up and was so excited.. he had to pull everything out and inspect everything individually! It was so fun and super cute! Adalyn's to young but looked adorable in her easter dress! Brett looked so handsome in his outfit!! I love it! Here are some pictures!

Here are some random pics of the kiddies!! They're so much fun! Brett doesn't often let me take pictures of him anymore! Its not fun for him anymore.. but once in a while i get him to cooperate! Adalyn is all for taking pictures! :) Typical girl!

The first one of brett is him wrapping my bra around him.. haha! I just loved his lil "innocent" face! And the second one makes me laugh so hard! He always climbs in her swing now.. turns on the music and will just sit there and swing!

These ones of adalyn.. First are her toes! I painted them and even put a yellow flower decal on her big toe that you can't see.. the next is her in her new swimming suit! I love it on her!! The next.. She was layin on our bed and was so tired she just kept looking at me with her sleepy eyes! Next..Clint laid her down on bretts bed on all the stuffed animals and she loved it!

And these ones... The first is adalyn playing with her feet! She loves them, she just recently discovered them and her tongue! Next.. Adalyn driving my car! I absolutely love that picture~ Next... Adalyn in her easter dress! I love it! And the last one is adalyn sleeping I loved that her lil butt cheek hung out on the left and her chubby legs! I love my chubby girl!! :)

Lots of fun pictures!! Kids are so fun. And handfulls! haha! Life has been crazy.. turns out clint and i aren't really divorced and we've been working on making our family work! Its going to take some work but i never wanted the divorce and wanted it to work so badly! He told me its harder to be apart than it is to be together and its so true! Marriage is hard work and we're trying to put forth the effort needed to make it work for us and our kiddies! So hopefully we pull it off! :) So far so good! I love him so much and so it's been great to be home with him! Anyways... I can't believe its may.. me and clint just celebrated our one year anniversary in park city! So fun!! I can't believe brett is going to be three soon! Well september.. FOUR MONTHS! He's getting so smart! He counts to ten and talks so much better! He's a very active rowdy toddler! HE's into everything and never stops till his head hits the pillow! He keeps me going! Adalyn is 5 1/2 months! YIKES! i can't believe that at the end of this month we're half way to her being a year! It just seems like its going to fast! I love them both so much and i hate seeing them grow up so fast but i love each stage they bring! :)

SuNsHiNe!

2009-04-08T10:16:00.000-07:00

I've had so much fun with my kiddies the last few days!! We've really been enjoying the sunshine! Its been great. Of course it won't last long because this is utah.. and spring sucks in utah! I'm so sick of it going back and forth!! Warm.. to Cold!! Anyways.. Monday we went for a long long walk around some pastures down here by my grandparents so brett could see the cows and horses.. and of course there were like none but he saw a few kitties and loved it! Brett absolutely loves being outside and going for walks!! Adalyn sleeps like the whole time! HA! Then on tuesday we went to the park with Brandi Lindauer Richards and her little girl and family! IT was so good to see all of them.. and it was great to let brett play. We only stayed for an hour because brett started to chase the guy on the little tractor thing that was painting the soccer lines on the field and then a lady started loading her kids up in her van to leave and he tried to jump in with them.. so we left after that! haha! He's so naughty sometimes and such a monkey! He had a blast though and it was nice to have him play real hard. We got a little sun burned! Which i'll greatly take with open arms! I love the sun!! Brett just got a little pink on his cheeks and nose.. and i got some color on my arms chest and face!! Yay!! haha! Adalyn was covered in the stroller really good and i didn't get her out for long so she didn't get any color thank goodness! Didn't realize it was gonna be a sunblock day! Its been great. I love being out and doing fun things with the kids and it make me feel more active. We walked to the park from my grandparents and then walked home and brett loved it and it was a good work out for me.. considering the whole walk up to the park is uphill and pushing a double stroller is hard as it is! haha! So on monday before our walk i took some cute pictures of the kiddies!

Little Miss Adalyn!!

Love this outfit! Thanks Chels!!

He's seriously the most handsome cheese ball ever!! :)

Watching Spongebob together!

He loves his sister so much!

You can't see it here.. but she loves him too!! She was all smiles!

Haha! His new favorite monkey face!!

I took some cute pictures after the park too.. but i'll post them tomorrow! ENJOY!

Crystal and Kiddies!

~MoNkEyS!~

2009-04-04T20:06:00.000-07:00

So life has been pretty slow for us lately! I've tried dedicating a lot more time to my kids. So i don't get on the internet as often. It makes me feel better about myself as a mother for some reason! Ha! So we've just been hanging out at home and waiting for summer to come so i can take my kiddies outside to play!! I can't wait to go for walks with them and even just let brett play in the back yard! Poor kid gets so cooped up in the house.. i do too! I took some pictures a while ago and forgot to post them.. i took them back in early february of adalyn! Then just the other day i took some of her and brett! I love my little monkeys! They seriously light up my entire life! I don't know what i'd do without them. They can push you to your limits but in the same second they make you wanna pull your hair out they can make you smile so big! I've been trying to do more things just me and brett.. so while adalyn is sleeping or just sitting in her chair being content.. i'm trying to pull puzzles out and do them with him or just have him sit on my lap while he watches his shows! I feel like he gets put to the side sometimes because adalyn is so demanding of my time right now.. so i've tried hard to do little things with him. I want to take him to that show monsters vs aliens! I think he'd really like it!! Anyways.. yeah so thats what we've been up too! I'm gonna post the pictures i took!! Cute little monkeys! I just love em! :)

The most beautiful smile in the whole world!! :)

She's absolutely precious!

Look at those gorgeous lips!

She's not sure about me sometimes! Ha!!

My chubbs!! I just love her chubby cheeks!! :)

Just when you thought she couldn't get any cuter!

They love each other so much!! Amazing how your whole world can fit into one picture!

My MoNkEyS!! I love them so much!!

He is the biggest goof ball! I love his guts!! He just started doing this one day..

Oh i just love them and i know you all do too!! haha! :)

Divorce...

2009-03-19T17:11:00.001-07:00

Divorce is a funny thing..

Well my divorce is final.. FAST i know! We signed our papers on the 4th of march and found out on tuesday (st. patricks day!) that our divorce was final as of the 10th! I'd been divorced for a week and didn't have any idea. Not that it would've changed anything but it was just a shock. I thought we had to take the stupid divorce/parenting class but we petitioned to get out of it (because we've taken the parenting class together already!) and i guess the judge allowed it. I called to see if the judge let us get out of the class or if we had to take it and she said "Oh i see your divorce has been final since the 10th!" I of course respond with... "Are you kidding me?" So yeah my divorce is final.. i was getting ready and i sat down for a minute as it hit me (it still feels so weird!) and i cried for a good half hour about it. I know its a good thing and will all be for the better but it was so final and so sudden.. i knew it was coming but not that quickly! When you try so hard for so long to make something work and hope so much for it all to be ok and then it just doesn't end the way you want it hits hard!! At least this did for me. I've tried to keep myself busy.. and tried to stay positive but sometimes a good cry is needed. I keep telling myself it will be good to be alone for a LONG time! But alone is such a LONELY thing! I'm glad i have a great family and fantastic friends to help me through it all. Its been really hard to cope with and deal with this time.. because i think i know how final it is.. and i've had a HUGE support system underneath me telling me to keep my head up and things will be ok. Its amazing how badly it can hurt when the person you want to love you more than anything tells you that they don't anymore. Its a HUGE blow to the self esteem and to your whole outlook on life. All i know is love shouldn't be so hard and i'm going to keep that in mind for future situations that may come my way! Love should be work at time but not all the time! It should feel effortless at times and so many things i went without or begged for like saying i love you or a kiss when he walks in the door from work these things should all just come naturally and i'll know to keep that in mind. Its so sad how we have to learn some things.. and some things are learned the VERY hard way!! So yes divorce is a funny thing.. it is the hardest thing you go through but in the end is the BEST thing you go through. It makes you a stronger person.. pushes you to your limits and in the end if you keep your mind set on what you really want and really need it can bring you the happiness you were searching for. Being single is weird.. and i don't feel like i am and i'm not sure if i'm ready for the dating scene or not but i know that it is going to be something i have to go through and hopefully i'll have a good time! I'm just ready to focus on me and my kids and finding myself again! I lost a lot of who i was in the last few years and i'm ready for the fun goofy girl to resurface!! So hopefully this new chapter in life with bring Few Tears.. Lots of Laughs.. and Many Memories!!

Me and My Baby Girl!!

2009-03-08T14:11:00.000-07:00

I took fun pictures of me and adalyn the other day at my grandparents house and then decided to have fun with them in picasa (a photo editer) but anyways.. They turned out so cute and so i wanted to post them for ya'll to enjoy! I need to take some pictures of me and brett and brett and adalyn together!

Most BEAUTIFUL baby girl in the whole world! :)

Me and my LoVeLy girl!

So Sweet

Yeah i'm crazy.. and she knows it! Just look at her face! ha! :)

Smooches!!

I love her guts so much!!

New Blog.. New Life!

2009-03-05T17:24:00.000-08:00

This is the new blog i started for me and my kiddies! Hopefully you all keep up with us and stay in touch! :)

As of March 4th, Me and clint signed our divorce papers and are practically divorced. We just have to take a divorce class and then the judge will sign the papers. It was very very hard afterwards. Its hard when you feel like the other person doesn't care.. cuz even though things aren't working out for the two of you and you know they don't love you anymore you still hope you've made some sort of impact on their life and that you meant something. It was hard but its definitely for the best. We both have a chance to be happy now and we get along better when we're not together, and that is ultimately the best thing for our kids. So life starts over from here once again.. and its scary, exciting, and sad. Hopefully we will both find good people to work in a partnership to raise our beautiful kids and also makes us incredibly happy. We both deserve it after working so hard in such a hard relationship. So we're bascially divorced.. we've signed our papers and its just a matter of time before its legal. Its hard to believe sometimes.

Well there ya go.. the new blog.. there will be more pictures and more updates coming soon so keep your eyes peeled!! :)

Crystal and her babies! :)