Crystal, Brett, and Adalyn!: Fall is here!

I'm going to try and get better at blogging!! Here is an update!

The Kids:

Brett is getting so tall. He's gonna be tall and skinny like his dad. He LOVES playing with the boys and is so protective of me and his sister! I love it. He always brings me flowers from outside. I'm raising such a gentleman!! He is turning 4 on the 25th this month! I can't believe it. Its nuts!! He's obsessed with iron man.. So we're having an iron man themed bday party for him!!

Adalyn is getting so damn much personality! She's so bubbly and fun! The girl would rather you put music on and let her dance than a movie on for her to watch! She's so much fun. She's got enough hair now for pigtails and ponytails. I love it. I've made her new bows i love em! She pulls em out but i'm teaching her not too. ha!

They both are loving the summer (as am i). We've spent so much time outside. In the backyard playing in the sandbox.. the swing set.. the playhouse.. playing games.. going to the park and for walks. Going to the zoo was super fun! the kids loved it!!

We're about to get into our own place in October and we're SO excited. Its where we lived last summer. Every time we pass it still to this day brett asks "we going to mom's house?" So i think they're excited. I'm so excited for us to have a place to call our own! :) It'll be good for us. I think they deserve a place to call home and not call grandma's and grandpa's! Hopefully we'll be in by halloween!! Then i can decorate for our first holiday in OUR home!! :)

Me:

Well as most of you know.. Back in February i moved in with my (at the time) boyfriend Tom. We'd dated for almost a year and had decided to live together. He thought it'd be helpful so i wouldn't have to work while going to school which at the time i thought was a great idea. It didn't end well. Buying a home in the area he wanted to buy in ended up becoming more of a priority to him and his parents than i was. It was a very sad hurtful and frustrating situation. We've been back at my parents house since end of june and its been great to be around people who love us. I went through a VERY hard time but got back up on my feet fast and got a job and was enjoying dating.. Until i got a SMACK IN THE FACE reminder of how hard and tedious it is! ha! Its amazing to me what an inconvenience it is to others that i'm so busy! haha! Apparently working full time, going to school full time and being as good a mother as i can be to my two kids makes me not so much fun for most people i used to call friends. And having standards and expectations when it comes to dating/potential relationships is also something that makes you undatable.. ha! Thank goodness. Haha! I honestly have no desire to date much at all. I've found out who my true friends are along the way as well. Turns out most the people i would call FRIENDS when i went through one of the hardest things i've ever been through were the first ones to go running in the other direction and i'm so thankful to know who has my back through thick and thin! :) They are amazing people i'll always be grateful too.

So i've learned a lot. I've learned that until i'm getting married i will never trust anyone enough to live with them. I will never be without a job ever again. It makes me to vulnerable to not take care of myself and my babies. I am done putting them through hell when i make bad decisions. I've got a very thick very tall very DURABLE guard up now.. and its going to take a lot to break it down or even get my attention through it. My kids are my priority. Its amazing how lost in a situation you can get. How you can think you're doing something good for them when really you'd of been better off doing the opposite. I'm learning. I'm not perfect but i'm trying for them. I live with guilt everyday for making life harder on them than i feel is needed. I hate that they do not have their dad around all the time and that we don't have our own place to call home. I'm glad and grateful to have such a wonderful father for them and to also be heading in the right direction. I'm getting back on track and it feels great! I feel healthier. Emotionally, mentally, and physically! :) I was not in a good place for a while and coming out of that never felt better.

Ok!!! Out of the gloom and onto the beautiful!! We recently got our family pics done!!! And i could not be more happy about them! They turned out great. My friend Danielle did them. Her business is Capture me photography! If you have facebook.. look it up and become a fan. She's doing an amazing fundraiser right now for each fb fan! :) She does amazing work. Check her out!! Here are some of the AMAZING pictures she did!! (she also did the on that is our blog picture!) Enjoy!!

My little family! :)